Current mood:	tired
Current music:	static
Entry tags:	boys, cops, ren faire, time clock milking

dang this is long! - good thing I cut it
edited, lengthened and reposted

Since I am here at work with nothing to do again....



It's really hard to think of my weekend in terms of good or bad right now seeing as I am SO frelling tired. It was a weekend. A lot happened. I had fun with a good portion of it. I wonder where to start; chronological makes the most sense, but I can really only recall now in a series of vignettes. I think I'll just go with my usual stream-of-consciousness. Try to keep up, my brain moves so fast it often appears that I jump from point A to L even though there is a logical thought process behind it.

So I was bookin down the 202 yesterday on my way to the ren faire. I was doing about 85. This SUV pulls up next to me and the guy inside just looks over. I notice the SUV is doing pace with me, so I look over. And notice the word "sheriff" painted on the side. And think, "Oh crap!" Then, "It's finally happened. I'm going to get pulled over for speeding." So I start slowing down. And I started getting over because my turnoff to the 101 was coming up. And the sheriff SUV starts slowing down too. And I get all the way over and turn onto the 101 and the sheriff keeps going, and I think, "Thank you, God! I really could not afford to get a ticket right now." And if you thought I learned a lessson about speeding, I still sped on my way there, but now only doing 80 rather than 85 and keeping an eye out for cops. Moral of the story: be aware! :)

Kevin the prince aka Prince James said last weekend I was a crazy driver. He was driving beside me for a little while on the way in to faire on Sat. I clarified for him that I am not a crazy driver - I am a very safe driver, I just like to drive fast. I think I'm a race car driver in a parallel universe. Speaking of Kevin, there was a cast talent show Sat night at the ren faire. He and 4 other guys did this very effeminate dance number to the song "I enjoy being a girl". I will never look at that gap commercial the same again. Then he and one of the guys from Bedlam Bells danced to "I'm too sexy for my shirt". They got cut short before they could take off their pants. Dammit. Kevin reprised the 1st dance for a few of us in attendance at Denny's last night. I had been so tempted all day long just to go up to him when he passed by and start singing to him. But I refrained - renaissance decorum and all; a merchantwoman may not walk up and address the prince. However, just before closing cannon when all of the royals were up near the front gate playing with patrons, 2 other girls and I went up to him and I started singing, "When I've got a brand-new hairdo and my eyelashes all in curls..." He got a pained look on his face, but then finished the verse for us. Tee-hee. Later when I told him about my urge to sing every time I see him, he begged me 'please,no!' Maybe I'll just hum loudly. ;) He had the cutest kid with him when we were singing. He was teaching the kid how to woo women. He (the kid) bent over our hands and kissed them and then did a low bow with his hat in his hands. It was absolutely adorable.

This was the last weekend at faire for both the tortuga twins and clan tynker. I'm kinda bummed because I've never gotten to see even one of clan tynker's shows. I see them frequently because they're all over the place at the faire, but I've never managed to make it down to mooncalf for one of their shows. They're really quite brilliant at what they do. I often see two of them backstage at the Rose because they stash their stilts there (central location and all). The stilts crack me up. They have little baby shoes on the bottoms of them. I see them and start giggling. Well that and there are few things more amusing than watching a person on stilts go through a low door. They had a few entries in the talent show. First one of the Tynker girls came out and she had a female mask over her face and a male mask on the back of her head with her braid hanging down to look like a beard. Then she danced to this oriental music. It was absolutely fascinating because she danced with either front or back to the audience and changed her movements accordingly so that they looked distinctly male or female. I was completely mesmerized. Next a few of the tynkers played along with magical mystical michael doing magic. Surprisingly (or not so surprisingly), it was a lot better than his usual show. I think it was because he didn't talk. At all. Because in his regular show, the magic is good, but the dialogue is awful. It ws also funny watching the tynker musicians react to the things he did. Last act of the show was the entire tynker clan rapping. It was funny, the rap itself was quite clever, but they're not very good rappers. Timing, rhythm, etc. I really want to say "white people syndrome", but I don't want to advocate stereotypes because stereotypes suck.

Just came up with a subject line for this post. It reminds me of t. "circumcising" his belt yesterday. He had decided that it was just too long. Of course then he had this nice length of loose leather to play with. Such an interesting boy he is. I discovered that he and n. exist in a duality of personality. One has to be happy, the other melancholy. They are never both in the same state at the same time. Last weekend, n. was happy for most of the weekend and t. was melancholy. This weekend it was reverse for most of the time except for an hour or two on sat. when t. was melancholy again and n. happy. n. and c. broke up this week, hence the melancholy. She wasn't there this weekend. I guess a couple of other things happened this week too. They say bad things come in 3s.

Got into a waterfight with n. on Sat. I would've won too, but he got lil-miss-14-year old to help gang up on me. I didn't realize until the end of the day that she's got a big ol' crush on him. Which is not great because n. is quite the flirt and she gets all pissy when he messes around with other girls. But anyhow, waterfight. He started it. I know that's what they all say, this time it was true. He took a bit of water that was left in his cup and chucked it at my chest. I was grateful that my bodice comes up as far as it does because my chemise is white. Yikes! Later I got him back with water down the back of his shirt. That was when he really got me. He got the 14 year old to help hold me and threw water up the skirt. My capris got uncomfortably wet. Then he went to get more water. I'd run into the participant only area to hide and asked the marquess of burgundy to straight-lace my bodice for me because it's gotten ridiculously loose. I'm going to have to have it taken in before the start of next season. Either that or get a new bodice. n. came in with the water when she was still lacing it and I told him he would need to wait until she was finished because it wasn't fair. So he did. And then he dumped water down my back. And then he grabbed the 14 year old's mug and splashed her water down my front. Needless to say, I was completely and totally wet... I told him I was going on break and did what any self-respecting renaissance performer would do, I walked over to the boathouse and got a couple of cookies and tried to dry off before I had to go work the bird show. Oh, and I plotted my revenge. Such good revenge it would've been. About an hour or two later, n. was flirting with a couple of girls whose job I can't remember; I had my mug full of water, came up behind him and grabbed the back of his kilt. Unfortunately, I didn't grab enough because instead of water going up the kilt, it just hit the back of the kilt. I was so disappointed. It would've been great revenge and ended up being only rather pathetic. Rats!

He kissed me. I didn't want him to. Nor was I expecting it. It was...awkward. The first time a boy's ever kissed me. (I went through a 13 year ugly phase) I blame the full moon. It does weird things to people. I, for instance, was more easily and strongly aroused than usual. One of the guys at faire (so completely not attracted to him) came up behind me and half-purred, half-growled in my ear just before I left that night as he frequently does. Normally it has a bit of an effect on me - that night I nearly took him right then and there. He offered to nibble on my neck. I had to pause a bit before I could decline. Back to n. It was at the talent show. The 14 year old had asked me to go look for n. with her.

Oooh. Funny side note: while we were looking for n., one of the girls from Bedlam Bells came up to me and asked to rub the buddha belly. I said what?! So she rubs my belly and then asks how far along I am. (To anyone who knows me, this is weird because I actually have a pretty flat stomach) To which I inform her that I am not pregnant. Like most people in that position, she gets an absolutely horrified look on her face and starts apologizing profusely. She said she mistook me for a friend of hers who was pregnant. Granted it was dark around that area, so it is entirely possible. Still, although I was able to laugh about it immediately afterwards, I do feel a little self-consciously fat.

And now back to our regularly scheduled story. 14 year old and I find n. He gives us both hugs and then drops his head down onto our chests. Oh the simple pleasures. I start tickling the back of his neck and he warns me to stop. I don't, so he starts doing the blowing on my neck thing. Normally it just tickles real bad. Full moon night it felt really good. Laughing low and holding on for dear life good. I don't remember exactly what happened next, but I think I kissed him on the cheek. He leaned in and I turned my head away from him. I thought he was going to do what he did to c. last week - lean in as for a kiss and then blow up her nose. Not a pleasant thought. But he kissed me. Huh. After this interlude the hawker girl that c. had been so jealous of came up and took over. According to the pissy 14 year old, he spent the rest of the night making out with her. Just one more reason not to get involved with the 19 year old. Oh yeah, and somewhere in the middle of this my roomate called to tell me she was spending the night at her parents new place and n. started making some really inappropriate comments about me going down on him that she could hear. She wasn't terribly pleased. I was really embarrassed and slightly annoyed.

On the other hand, I talked to "boy I could easily fall for if I let myself" a couple of times at faire and after this weekend. The more I read his lj, the more I think he might be exactly what I'm looking for. Downside: It doesn't seem that he has the slightest bit of interest in me. *sigh. Told him Sat. that I had stumbled across his lj. He was just like, "Oh, ok." Grrr, argh.

Tee hee. Gir, yeah! (I'm going to sing the "Doom" song)

So my roomate's mom and step-dad just moved to town on Thurs. They want to be close for when her brother and his wife start having kids. They were supposed to have given us a couch and a loveseat. We were really happy because we were going to have increased seating and could get rid of the futon with the worn-out mattress that we had been using as a couch that every single person who's come to our apartment and sat on it has complained about. What they actually gave us: the loveseat, a chair, an ottoman, 3 coffee tables, a bunch of Erin's stuff that had been sitting at their house and a crapload of stuff from one of Erin's friends that he had just never picked up. Yeah, cuz we have room for all that at our apartment. (heavy sarcasm) I think we may have actually lost seating with the current arrangement. Argh. And I'm a little irritated with all the coffee tables because there's one that we just couldn't make fit and now when I work out in the mornings I have to move this big-ass coffee table from in front of the TV.

It's weird though. Erin and I have often prided ourself on being at least a little bit ghetto. We po' folks and have been po' folks for any number of years (me nearly all of my life). We also like random, silly stuff. Now we have this living room that actually looks like a living room rather than a dorm room (with the exception of the wall of quotes). The rest of the downstairs looks pretty apartmentish too. George has been banished to upstairs, Supermonkey got relegated to the closet, as did Hula Monkey, and I don't know what she did with all of her Spongebob stuff. And I feel like somehow I'm supposed to be more of a grown-up. All this from a bit of new furniture. Are we still ghetto? I feel identity confusion.

As to the rest of the ren faire, I got to work at the Rose again on Sun. Hooray! My favorite stage. Blackenshear and Jayna were happy to have me back. Felt really bad because during the last Sassy Lassies show some little toddler was running through the rows of benches, fell and smacked his head on one of them. I felt responsible because I should have been watching. Instead I was sitting and watching the show. Felt a little bad for the Sassy Lassies. They said trying to get the crowds to laugh was like pulling teeth. Blackenshear and Jayna on the other hand say Sunday was their best day this season - really playful crowds. I guess a lot of people felt like the sexual humor was stuff they shouldn't laugh at on Easter Sunday. I don't know.

I had a wonderful Easter Sunday despite only having gotten 2 1/2 hours of sleep the previous night. Sunrise service up in North Scottsdale. Tangent: I picked up a paper Sat because I was told that they advertised Easter and church services on Saturdays. Yeah, 1/2 page advertisement with about 6 churches listed, most of them in the far east and west valleys. Humph. In Kalamazoo, they would've had 3-4 pages of announcements. Ridiculous. Moving on: sunrise service was good and needed. Talked to family on way home. My nephew turn 4 in July. Haven't seen him since Christmas. He's such a good talker now. Most of his words are actually intelligible to the average listener. Went to faire. Went to Denny's. One of the first there and one of the last to leave. Listened to Kendra's hilarious stories of her cooking fiascos. n. was there. Didn't really talk to him, just hugged him a few times. And wore his watch for a little bit. I don't know - the 14 year old came over and put it on me and later came back and took it away. Talked to Andrew in the parking lot a bit. Nice enough guy, one of the hawkers I went through rennie basic training with, pretty good-looking too; no romantic interest in him. Odd: n. was walking to his car getting ready to leave. I ran to say good-bye to him. Hugs, kiss on the cheek, etc. Had a. with me. He hugged her too. I made some comment about how there's a 10 year age difference between me and a. and yet neither of us are available to him. He made some comment about how he doesn't want to date a 35 year old. Not the first time he's made that comment. I know he does it just to try to get me to react - though I don't. I don't think he gets why I won't date him. Odd thing was that after this a. and I walked to my car (I was driving her home) and n. turns around and walks back to the entrance to talk to these 2 girls he'd been sitting at a table with all evening. Actually the same 2 girls he was talking to when I tried the kilt revenge.

Odder thing: although I obsess about this, I really can't bring myself to care that he flirts with other girls. Hmm. Maybe it's because I really just consider him a boy-toy rather than boyfriend material. Callous me? I hope not. I'd hate to think I could be that uncaring to another person.

Ahhh. It feels good to get this expurgated out of my system. Fin.


Another day, another dollar of company time wasted. I have got to get out of here.
If you manage to read the text of the entire cut, congratulations. You have a longer attention span than I do.